Party of one

It's New Year's Eve and I am having a party of one. I've got my glass of wine, a fridge full of food and a tv ready to go to watch the ball drop in all four time zones. Hopefully E will get off work early so that we can have our new year's kiss!
I am not sweatin my party of one because I think new years is over rated and tomorrow we are hosting a brunch/open house. Taking a cue from Linds and a dear friend from Chicago, I decided that we should start our own tradition of new year's day fun here in the bay. We have no idea if our neighbors or friends will show up but at least we can try. I am making a spinach and cheese strata, breakfast pizza, bagels with cream cheese and lox. Plenty of mimosas and bloody mary's for everyone or just me! :)
I loved Platinum Rose's blog entry and how she recapped this past year so I think I will do the same. I am such a coppy cat these days and I love it!!! :)

2007, a year of change....

E and I started this year in Orange County. At an April wedding in the bay, I started to feel like I could live in the bay area. The reason why we didn't move here originally is because I wasn't ready to leave my friends and family and immediately live where his friends and family are. The next month, May, while visiting his mom, we had a coming out conversation--meaning we both came out and admitted we weren't happy in the OC. Two days later I came to Eli and told him I was ready to move up there.

In Febuary, Eli embarked on the pathway to his dream of becoming a pilot. He started flight school at ATP in Riverside and Long Beach, CA. It took a lot of hours and his time away from me. Seeing him come home from flying and the big smile on his face had made the sacrafice so worth it. I also got to take a flight with him to Catalina Island.. He finished his training in November and is now on his way to becoming a commercial pilot.

In March, I started this blog as we were all jumping ship from the nest. Do you all remember the nest?? I have met so many wonderful friends and I really believe you ladies got me through my lonley times in SoCal and still get me through on a day to day basis. If it wasn't for this blog, I would have never met in person Jenny or Rusti or reconnected with Tracey, a friend of mine from Chicago, who has the cutest child ever! Nor would have "virtually" met anyone one of you. I am very, very fortunate!

My baby brother got married in July. While I had issues with his soon to be wife. From this post after the wedding I truly have come to love her like my own sister. She is wonderful for my brother. When my grandfather past away, we had a total bonding moment in the limo. I literally cried in her arms as we left the grave side. I am helping her with her job change in Seattle. I know this is the start of many wonderful memories with us as SIL's as well as the four of us.

In August I received an offer letter to join an awesome company here in the bay. I am so lucky to be apart of this great company. I am constantly challenged recruiting for a skill set that is always changing. I truly feel apart of a great team and know the contributions that I have made thus far have not gone unnoticed. I am excited to see what 08 brings.

August 14th we made the move to the bay area. We also moved in with my MIL and lived with her for 12 weeks! I am so appreciative of this woman and how she opened up her home for us. While I had issues with her ability to cook chicken, I love her to death. She is the coolest MIL ever. I also was given the opportunity to take a month off and go see my family back in the midwest. I was able to spend time in Des Moines. I saw my grandfather. This will always be a special memory to me. He still knew who I was and I was able to get past my own sad emotions about how much Alzheimers had taken him away to really get some quality time with him. I believe this is why I was able to get through his passing with such peace. I thank my husband so much for giving me this opportunity.

In September I turned 32. Now I know this isn't a big deal but in my world birthdays are big. I look at the year before and figure out how I have grown. I love being in my thirties and I can see how much I have changed for the better since my teens and my twenties. I am ready to take every year with grace and determination to be better then I was the year before.

In October we celebrated our year anniversary and buying our first home.. I love it! I am so happy we are here and we had the guts to do this. Being a homeowner is my biggest accomplishment. I know without my husband I will would have never been able to do this. Our year anniversary was perfect. With all the change that took place, I am so happy we were able to stay on the same page. As year 2 moves I think our biggest challenge is to keep up the communication as our lives start to settle down and Eli begins his new career as a commerical pilot.

December was a bittersweet month. My best friend got married and my grandfather passed away. Both happend with in a few days of each other. It was amazing to go and celebrate a couple pledging their life together and then go be with my grandmother as she said goodbye to her life partner. They were married at 16, he was 78 when he passed. Both experiences taught me stop sweating the small stuff. Though my recent post still shows i am still sweatin it, I am trying each day to let the unimportant things roll off. I hope 2008 will give me the ability to grow in that pledge.

I also want to thank everyone for their advice on my desire to embark on the dream to become a career coach and starting a blog as a begining to that pathway. I have taken Mrs M's suggestion and started brainstorming on various topics..now all I have to do is start writing, well, actually start having the confidence to write. I am hoping to start doing so in 2008.

Cheers to a great New Year to each of you and I can't wait to see what 08 has in store for all of us!!!

Here are pictures from my front porch of the sunset for this new year's eve.

note to self--don't take things personally

Throughout the day today I've been rehashing a conversation that took place last night. I can't help but feel extremely pissed off, annoyed and personally attacked by this individual. I recognized that this person was giving my husband "pilot career advice" and validating some of the thoughts Eli has about certain airlines or a pilot path he should or should not take. However,when you tell the wife that it sucks that she is in a good job or not mobile..meaning able to pick up and move for her husband's job as a pilot, you piss the living hell out of her and she is not going to be nice in future conversations you have with her for the rest of the evening.
Let's go back in time....
Eli and I head over to a family friend's home for a great Christmas dinner. Upon arriving, Eli meets a friend who is a pilot for a commercial airline. These two immediately start talking for a very long time. I am chatting up everyone else, catching up with my MIL, etc. Next thing I know, we are in a conversation of why we decided to buy instead of rent, questions on whether or not I am mobile or if my job allows me to be mobile and then I hear that I suck because my job is good and that Eli can't move around for his pilot training and that he should be sleeping on couches etc. When this comes out, I become extremely defensive and say that I have been there done that--paid my dues for my job and that we are lucky that I have a decent paying job so that Eli can pursue his dream. I understand what it takes for him to get to where he needs to be--being away ALOT of the time. I get that, I am not happy about it, but I get that. Eli comes in on my behalf and explains to this guy how supportive I am, etc. Finally this guy gets it and is all about how great I am. Sweet.
I know Eli knows that I am fully on board with his dream and I am beginning to understand that being married to a pilot is not going to be easy. Right now we are getting by on my salary which is great but I know how much he hates that I am pulling the weight around here. I think what pissed me off about this guy is how one sided he was. I know you don't know what you don't know and it is very obvious that he has no idea what being married means or even how your choices in life affect others. I guess it just made me so mad that here I am giving up things--willingly so that my husband can have the career of his dreams--so don't tell me that I suck. Because honestly I don't.
I don't know if this guy meant it or not or that it was the wine talking but he seriously made me upset. This of course lead to me being very sarcastic--I daresay bitchy towards him at dinner. Eli then got pissed at me for being a bitch--ummm didn't this guy tell me that I suck????!!!!

note to self--get over it and don't take things personally because it is not worth the extra energy it takes to get upset over it.

If I build it, would you come?

Some of you know, I am a recruiter. I have been in the recruiting industry for about 9 years now. I was an in-house recruiter for two years, then went to work for a recruitment adveritsing agency in account management for three and now for the last four years, a 3rd party recruiter.

My dream is to become a life/career coach. I've been putting this dream on the back burner for awhile and now I am wondering if I should start taking steps to get closer to that dream. I just got off the phone with my sister in law (brother's wife) in counseling her on resume writing, interview techniques and advice on working with a 3rd party recruiter. As I got off the phone, I started thinking about my personal blog and whether or not I should start a recruiting advice corner blog. I know I am not the first of its kind out there so it begs the question should I even start one. If I did, I would need to make it relevent or maybe even nichy so it stands out.
So, dear internet, what topics as it relates to job hunting, interviewing, resume writing, career change, getting back into the work force would be of interest to you? What burning questions are out there that you would be dying to ask a recruiter.

Let's ponder this, shall we?

happier me...

Today was such a pisser of a day that by the time the day was over I was feeling kind of lousy.To help ease the pain, my sweet co-worker offered me a ride to the BART station on her way to the gym. This saved me a good 15 minute walk down hill in my 3 inch heels--god love her and she decided that the nights she is working out after work she would give me a ride to the station after work. Um, can I say I LOVE YOU!!!
I had a bit of a walk to the station which gave me some time to look around and see a new part of San Francisco. It also gave me time to reflect on my day and to try not be so upset about everything. As I took the escalator down into the station, there was a guy asking everyone if they had an extra "bart" card. Of course everyone ignored him. Usually I am one to by-pass people asking for money or a transfer card because after living in a city environment for the last 10 years you become jaded. Today though was different. I had a extra bart card in my purse and for selfish reasons-- really to make myself feel better I knew I had to give this guy my extra bart card. Walking past the guy, I stepped aside and fished around in my purse for the card. Finally I found it and I checked the amount left on it...$7.64--perfect! I walked up behind him and tapped his shoulder and without saying a word I gave it to him. He looked at me and said thank you and we walked toward the entry, he then looked down at the amount on the card--smiled and said now he could go the north pole and back. That my friends made me laugh out loud as I took the escaltor down to meet my train. I have no idea where this guy needed to go as he didn't follow me down the escalator, however I know in my heart that card would absolutely get him there and possibly back to the embarcadero bart station, if need be.
When I got home, I was able to end my day on a good note by talking to my dear friend Lindsay--who really has me convinced that I should name my first born after her but only if she moves here :). Seriously though this girl is my chicken soup for my soul and she is hilarous! You should check out her blog--"get your eat on". The link is located on my side bar. I also have to give a shout out to her dear friend, Cat, down in atlanta--rumor has it she has stopped by here and I hope next time she does, she will say hello!!!

okay...seriously???

http://omg.yahoo.com/jamie-lynn-spears-says-shes-pregnant/news/4928

pass me a tissue please...

It finally caught up to me...a stupid head cold. I have been dodging this thing for some time now and it finally knock me down. All weekend I was out for the count. Which sucked because it was a beautiful weekend and now it is cold, dreary and rainy :( blah!

folks, keep your fingers crossed that we finally sell this damn jeep and go back to 2 car family like normal people.

Here are a couple of pictures for your viewing enjoyment.

One of me and my niece Raelyn


And Eli, me and Raelyn ( I think we look very nice with 3)

Thank you

I would like to thank everyone for their sweet,sweet thoughts and prayers. Eli and I did make it home to Iowa as well as my brother before my granddad passed. If you have ever witnessed someone pass then you know it is the most amazing thing to ever witness. I don't normally do recaps but I do need to put my thoughts down on what this past week was like....

Eli and I decided that we would take the red eye Monday night and arrive into Des Moines at 8am. My brother had already booked a flight from Seattle into Des Moines and he was set to arrive by 9am. My dad picks me and E up and takes us straight to the health center where my granddad was living. We arrive and my grandmother, i call her mommal (cross between mom and grandma) was there as was my mom, my uncle mike and pastor Millens. My granddad was in a deep state of sleep--he was doped up on morphine to help with the pain. I went over to him and put my hand on his and kissed his forehead. He twitched a little but I am not sure if it was his reaction to me or the morphine. I proceeded to talk to him in hopes he could hear my voice and told him to hang on just a bit longer for Bryan to get there. His breathes were getting longer a part so we knew it was only a matter of time.

Bryan arrived at 930am. We gave him some private time with granddad and then by 945am we were surrounding his bed holding hands. The Pastor said a prayer for my granddad to go on home and that we were ready for him to go. We all said the Lord's prayer together. I think this is the first time in my life I felt proud that I knew the Lord's Prayer--which is something that I learned from my granddad and mommal. As his breathes were getting longer, the tears were falling, I cried out, I love you Granddad as we all thought this was it...what felt like an eternity of no breathing, he came back with a heavy and deep breathe--this put everyone into a fit of laughter amongst the tears.It was tension breaker. However,after that last deep breathe, it was over. 10am on 12/4 my beloved granddad went home to his maker. This was exactly a week before his 79th birthday.

I left the room shortley there after and took a walk with my husband. I felt complete peace. It was the strangest feeling. Tuesday night, the family gathered at my mommal's. We had an abundance of food--special thanks to my uncle's friends who certainly made sure the grandkids were well fed. The grandkids pick out pictures for the slideshow and the adults tended to the funeral planning. It was so great to look at all these pictures of my granddad--even though I had seen so many of them before. This time around I could actually see my granddad's spirit in these pictures. Jump to Thursday and that is when the sadness started to creep in.

Thursday night was the visitation. Des Moines got hit with a bad snow storm. Despite the snow storm we had an estimated 140 people come to the visitation. It was wonderful to see so many people who came out to pay their respects and share wonderful, heart warming stories about my granddad. I always knew this man was special but hearing these stories really reinforced it. Friday was the funeral. My mommal decided to do an untraditional funeral service. The service was truly a celebration of my granddad's life. My dad did the eulogy. Eli and Bryan did a reading. We had someone playing the alto sax in a jazzy version of amazing grace. I want to find this version and add it my mp3 player. It brought tears to my eyes when I heard this. During the recessional, the family walked out to the song "When the saints go marching in" This song conjuers up a warm memory of my granddad banging on the piano playing this song and singing his heart out.

We went to the cemetery and had a quick grave side service. My granddad was in the military so we had a military person playing taps on the bugle. Oh wow is that the saddest thing I have ever heard. Once the graveside service was completed, I walked past the casket, I put my hand on it and whispered "I love you". Ever since yesterday I have had an empty feeling in my heart. This new feeling of a hole that now resides in my heart. I asked Eli about this and if he experienced the same thing last year when his grandpa died. He said yes, he felt the same way. Over time the feeling will subside but you will never be able replace that hole in your heart for that person.

I am so thankful I made it there on Tuesday. I can't believe I have been gone for a week and missed a whole week of work but after what I experienced with my family. I don't even care that I will most likely have to have last week go unpaid.


FRANCIS W. (JIM) MORRIS

Urbandale

Jim Morris, 78, formerly from West Des Moines died peacefully, surrounded by family, Tuesday, December 4, 2007 at the Deerfield Life Care Retirement Community on Hickman Road in Urbandale, Iowa.

Jim was born December 11, 1928 in McWhorter, West Virginia. On June 27, 1946 he was united in marriage to Phyllis Badgett of Fairmont, West Virginia.

He graduated from Fairmont High School in 1946 and went on to Fairmont State University where he graduated cum laude with a BS in Business Administration. He served two years in the Army at Fort Benning, Georgia from 1950 through 1952. He worked for General Mills for 36 years which took him from Parkersburg, WV, Columbus, OH, Cincinnati, OH, Chicago, IL and then to Des Moines, IA, in 1967 as a district sales manager. Retiring from General Mills in 1988, he then volunteered at the Polk County courthouse as a small claims mediator. He enjoyed worshiping his Lord and Savior Jesus Christ by serving on many church boards, singing, directing music, spreading the good news, leading bible study and greeting visitors on Sunday mornings. His favorite bible passages come from Psalms 121 and John 14 with special love of John 14:2, "In my father's house are many rooms; if it were not so would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?" In his leisure time Jim would garden, and he enjoyed watching football and baseball, especially when it came to the Chicago Cubs, da-Bears, and the Iowa Hawkeyes.

Jim is survived by his wife, Phyllis; son, Larry (Diane) Morris of Atlanta, Georgia, son, Mike (Jan) Morris of West Des Moines, Iowa; granddaughter, Heather (Eli) Robbins of San Francisco, California; grandson, Bryan (Amy) Morris of Snoqualmie, Washington; granddaughter, Alexandria Morris of Iowa City, Iowa; granddaughter, Samantha Morris of West Des Moines; sister, Alice Lee (Jim) Rogers of Clarksburg, West Virginia; brother, Buddy (Mary Louise) Morris of Tyrone, Georgia; sister, Jane (Wendell) Beveridge of Niles, Ohio, as well as four nephews and six nieces.

He was preceded in death by his parents, Waitman Wayne and Mable Morris of Fairmont, West Virginia.

Visitation will be Thursday, December 6, from 4:30 to 7:30 p.m. at Shepherd of the Valley Lutheran Church, 3900 Ashworth Road, West Des Moines, IA.

Funeral services will be at Shepherd of the Valley Lutheran Church on Friday, December 7, at 10:30 a.m.

The family requests no flowers. Memorial contributions can be made to Shepherd of the Valley Lutheran Church, 3900 Ashworth Road, West Des Moines, IA 50265 or the Alzheimer's Association, 1730 28th Street, West Des Moines, IA 50266, http: //www.alz.org/greateriowa/in_my_community_donate.asp

One wedding and one funeral

talk about highs and lows....I learned on Friday that my granddad was admitted into the hospital for pneumonia. With his body and mind already detoriated he didn't have the strength to fight off the infection. He was moved into hospice and making him comfortable is the ultimate goal. I had a good cry on Friday and was able to suppress the sadness and turn it into happiness for my best friend and her wedding. The wedding was GOREGOUS and so much fun! She even got her white wedding as it started snowing during the ceremony so as we opened up the church doors you could see the snow blowing like you were in a snow globe.

Today I am back in SF and received a call around lunchtime from my mom telling me I need to get on a plane and come to Des Moines. Eli and I are taking the red eye tonight. I left work this afternoon and managed to finish out the day working from home. I tried to say good bye to him over the phone but just couldn't say the words. I am not sure if he will make it through the night, part of me wonders if he is waiting for his two grandkids to come home. My brother and I arrive tomorrow morning.

Even though I knew this day would come, I was not prepared for the deep sadness I feel. This is the first of my four grandparents to go. I am so very fortunate to had my granddad in my life for this long. He wasn't able to make it my wedding but in his mind he was there and he would tell you that he was there :)